Mother of Pearl
© by Suraj Holzwarth 2022 There is nothing more intense, no labor harder, physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually, nothing more...
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Momologues
Sixty-two self-identifying mothers responded to 18 text prompts. Read them here.
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Mar 22, 2023
Dripping from the Water of Yesterday‘s Bath
Tonight I treated myself with a bubble bath the water filled to the tippy-top, As I lie in the tub I am drawn to the effervescent sound...
Jul 28, 2022
Strike One, Strike Two, Strike Three
My entry into motherhood wasn't sunshine and daisies. From the moment I found out I was pregnant I was scared. And I remained scared for...
Jul 13, 2022
The sound of that heartbeat cemented my faith
My husband was out of town for the day of my scheduled checkup. Home with our first born (via emergency cesarean), I was well into my...
Jul 10, 2022
Abortions are health care.
She was trying to become pregnant after so much planning. She’s so smart, such a planner. She was so thrilled to finally get a positive...
Jul 10, 2022
I know my healing continues as I share my story
My husband and I already had two beautiful, healthy children that were well into self-sufficient ages. Two children were all we could...
Jul 10, 2022
You never fully get the true picture of your own childhood until you parent your own child
Listen, I never liked kids before having my own. I never cared about childhood development. I never knew babies were whole humans that...
Jul 10, 2022
My mother is a grandmother now.
"My mother is a grandmother now she says to me let’s catch up so I put my book down take a deep breath say sure and she is already...
Jul 10, 2022
We all are born, we live and we all die, but fuck cancer.
Birth and death seem to go hand in hand. The immense feelings, emotions, and experiences that come with motherhood are unexplainable, ...
Jul 7, 2022
My body seems foreign but my baby is healthy.
After a surprise pregnancy and 9 months getting used to the idea of my new role, I had outlined my birth “preferences”. I had always...
Jul 7, 2022
Momma Held it Down
Grief has been an old friend to me. Since I was a young girl I’ve lost many friends and family member to an array of deaths dealings;...
Nov 1, 2021
One, Two, Three, Four, Five
Driving through Utah on our way to Zion National Park, I keep checking my phone, looking for some bars. I can’t believe that our fate is...
Dec 13, 2020
‘Who will hold me?’ I wondered.
My last month of pregnancy I was wondering where my friends were. Busy with their business and not inviting me their fun. I guess due to...
Dec 13, 2020
It was a shock to me.
Trigger Warning: This story contains subject matter relating to suicide. It was a cool November morning. I was cleaning up the kitchen...
Dec 13, 2020
Baby absorbing baby.
Trigger Warning: This story contains subject matter relating to Vanishing Twin Syndrome. We had tried just about everything to get...
Dec 13, 2020
The death of a future I thought I was going to have.
There is nothing like being a mother. Our stories are unique, and should be honored as such. If we don’t, many vulnerable women will feel...
Dec 13, 2020
They didn't push him up, they didn't sew my cervix shut
Trigger Warning: This story contains subject matter relating to death. Something felt wrong. I went to the bathroom and knew something...
Dec 13, 2020
They don’t tell you so much. They can’t.
"They don’t tell you so much. They can’t. No one can tell you what it will be like to be ten days overdue, lost in a hazy world of...
Dec 13, 2020
They had to sedate her
Trigger Warning: This story contains subject matter relating to suicide. I work in the deli at Hannaford. I am in the chicken room...
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